You know how every guy has one or two killer lines? Well these guys (and girls) have tons of them. Check out the best lines from 'My Boys'.
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"I can be your DOF"
"What's a DOF?"
"Deputy of Fun."
- Mike and Bobby in John, Cougar, Newman Camp

"Andy's new bed is unbelievable. It's literally like sleeping on a cloud."
"It made me like myself more."
"It's as soft as Swedish astronaut skin."
- Mike, Kenny and Andy in Off Day

"Okay, what would be the craziest thing I could tell you guys right now?"
"That...you found a mysterious hatch."
"You have the power of flight."
"You're a dude."
- PJ, Bobby, Andy, Mike in Shirt Contest

"Dude, you played the soft hits of the seventies. You were basically torturing people for a living."
- Mike to Brendan in Shirt Contest

"And free drinks for the Mike-Mike."
"Dude, please. Don't call yourself the Mike-Mike."
"It's horribly offensive."
- Mike, Bobby and Andy in Shirt Contest

"A British accent could make Jim Belushi sound cool."
- Stephanie to Brendan in Shirt Contest

"Wine tasting is really just a classy way for people to get day drunk."
- Kenny in Jack & Bobby

"You have a history with Bobby and you kissed his brother. How would you feel if he kissed Andy?"
"Confused. Bobby could do so much better than Andy."
- Stephanie and PJ in "Opportunity Knocks"

“Meredith’s story is really simple. She’s married to my brother. She completely dominates his life and, according to Andy, she’s the wicked witch of the Midwest.”
- PJ in Off Day

“Well if you want to go, We can go.”
“No, no, no. I mean, whatever you want to do.”
“Well, let’s go.”
“We can get a beer.”
“Or ten.”
- PJ and Brendan in The Promise of a New Season

“Andy, why did you go home first?”
“Cause I had a few hours free and I wanted to spend them all in my car.”
- Mike and Andy in The Promise of a New Season

“What am I, a heroin addict? How am I supposed to sleep in the chair?"
“I can get you a blanket, come on. We’re not cavemen around here."
“I’m weird. I’m one of those people who don’t like to sleep in a chair. So, if I’m gonna crash at your place, I’m gonna need a new bed.”
- Andy and Mike in Off Day

“He puts the lotion in the freakin’ basket, ya know.”
- PJ in Off Day

“Daddy, do you think I can be a drunken cast off someday?”
“Dare to dream sweetie. Good night.”
- PJ and Andy in Ethics

“Are you saying you’d be flattered to be flattered by me? That’s flattering.”
- PJ in Ethics

“That’s the guy over there, number twenty-six. Chicago’s sexiest"
"Wow, that’s...butt plumber, really? Thought you would’ve gone for sexiest doctor or attorney. You know, someone in a higher bracket.”
“PJ, union plumber.”
- Stephanie and PJ in Ethics

“Hold it. You’re taking your girlfriend to a party where the hottest, richest women in Chicago will be throwing themselves at you?”
“What’s wrong with that?”
“Dude, you don’t bring sand to the beach."
- Mike and Brendan in Ethics

“It’s ok Mike. I’ll take a rain-check on the stories about you sleeping with my mother’s friend.”
“Ok, but ‘CLEAN UP! MIKE’S ROOM!”
- Bobby and Mike in Welcome Back Kalla Fotter

“Wait a minute, why am I agreeing with Mike?”
“It doesn’t feel right, does it?”
- Brendan and Kenny in Welcome Back Kalla Fotter

“Yeah, Elsa woke up on her wedding day and her first thought was, ‘I need to know more about Bobby’s friends.' How many combs does Mike have? Does Brendan have a bicycle?”
- Kenny in Welcome Back Kalla Fotter

“Dude, I could totally rock a ‘stache. Like Burt Reynolds.”
“Me too.”
“You? More like Debbie Reynolds.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“You’re a hair-less freak.”
“Whatever, I could totally out-stache you.”
- Brendan, Mike and Kenny in Welcome Back Kalla Fotter

"There are three things that I do well. Change a flat tire…”
“Scare babies.”
“Live in a house with one chair.”
- Mike, Brendan and Kenny in Welcome Back Kalla Fotter

“We’re having a mustache growing contest.”
“Interesting. So even if you win, you still lose.”
- Mike and Andy in Welcome Back Kalla Fotter

“I’m getting a ton of attention from the ladies. I mean, mostly them holding their purses tighter or steering their children away from me, but still.”
- Kenny in Welcome Back Kalla Fotter

“All babies look just like me.”
- Andy in Welcome Back Kalla Fotter

“Shouldn’t you be telling the neighbors you’re a sex offender?”
“Shouldn’t you be panning for gold circa 1849?”
- Kenny and Mike in Welcome Back Kalla Fotter

“I’m sorry mustaches are okay and bridge is ridiculous. Where is the line?”
- PJ in Welcome Back Kalla Fotter